Many of us have come from situations we wouldn’t prefer. There may be unhealthy practices of many types in our familial background. Bringing about change in your life can be a hard thing. I’m going to share what insights I come across on my own journey.
One of the hardest things to do for me is to stop comparing myself to others. (This is especially hard since I majored in a subject where competition is part of the game.) Recently I’ve realized why I should try not to compare myself to others.
I know a number of young women my age, some older or younger, who do some things (or seemingly everything) better than me. This one knows all sorts of recipes and is an amazing cook, while that one is great at staying healthy or running a household. This one is possibly the kindest and most sincere person you’ve ever met, while that one has well behaved children and must be the best parent ever!
Lately I’ve realized, they all have different backgrounds. Their families, most likely, instilled in them their skills and knowledge and helped them develop their confidence and self-worth. So if we’re a little behind, there is no need to worry. There is still time to develop those attributes which are desirable to us.
If I want to be a good cook I can get a good cookbook or attend classes (even with limited funds there are library cookbooks or community classes at times). If I want to become healthy (something many of us are always trying to achieve), I can educate myself and surround myself with people who have similar goals.
I guess the point is, almost wherever you start out in life, you have the chance to make your life what you would like it to be. I think the first step is to decide what you would like your life to be. (And I suggest not going for shallow things like fame and fortune, but for real happiness achieved by having good family and friends to surround yourself with.)
Hi. Nice post. I hear you on that frustrating thing we tend to do; comparing ourselves to others. I’m just beginning my new path as coaching in leadership & personal development, and one thing I tell my clients (and myself) is to use yourself as a role model first. By remembering times in your live you were most proud of [accomplishing a goal, a great memory ect] you begin to use yourself as a template for your own success & capabilties — and it’s a really empowering feeling. You’re right on with taking classes & engaging in activities that interest you. Follow that, and you’ll always feel encouraged within yourself. Keep posting!
By: undercurrentnotes on January 26, 2010
at 7:40 pm